Safety For Parents
I am fortunate to play many roles in my life, all of which are passions of mine. As the proud parent of an eight year old and a four year old, two boys, I like to think I have more experience than I did, say, eight years ago. This certainly does not mean that I do everything right, but I do try to think hard about my actions, as well as my words. Now, it’s mostly because I know that my two resident mimics will be repeating what I say and do during the course of their school lives, starting now, and I would like them to avoid my childhood experience of multiple trips to the principal’s office, many of which were initiated by my own repetition of things my father did, which I thought were hilarious. In hindsight, perhaps referring to my 7th Grade math class as the Sam Houston Institute of Technology wasn’t a well thought out idea on my part.
However, eight years ago, after the birth of my first, it was mostly about safety. I was very conscious that I was going to leave my son in the produce section at the supermarket while I roamed around getting different things, or that I would forget he was in the car at the gas station, while the pump was on “auto” and I ran into the bathroom. These were both common acts for me before fatherhood, and I sometimes found myself taking a couple of steps away out of habit, and then remembering I had somebody else that I was responsible for.
CHILDREN LEFT IN CARS
Lately, there seems to be a rash of cases where parents who seem to willingly leave their child in the car, unattended, while they run errands, or while they conduct their regular lives, sans infant. I’m not referring to the horrible, horrible tragedies that seem to pop up each summer, when a parent forgets their child in the car on a hot day. I truly believe those are accidents. I refer more to the parent who leaves their child sleeping in the car while they run into their favorite store, for “just a minute”. I am thankful for the passersby who will call 911 to report that there is a child locked in an auto, I only wish it didn’t happen that way. You might think that it is alright if you leave the car running, or the air conditioner running. Junior needs his nap, and you need your stuff. This is unacceptable parenting, no matter how you look at it. Let’s leave aside the laws that state about leaving children unattended. Think about the following scenarios, which could occur while you are in the store:
· Your car is struck in the parking lot
· The air conditioner fails
· The car overheats, and starts an engine fire
· Somebody breaks your window to steal your GPS, and decides they will steal the child, as well.
I mention that it seems to be more prevalent now, because I personally respond to 1 or 2 of these calls every week or two, as a member of a a volunteer Rescue Squad. In some cases, it is clearly an accident. You’re putting the child in the car, your keys fall out, and the door locks. Or, in one case, the two year old managed to lock the door through a random act of pushing buttons. However, most of the cases involve parking the car in the parking lot, and going into the store. Let me assure you that if I am on the scene and there is a child unattended in the vehicle, I, as an emergency medical provider, will gain access to that child, quickly, to ensure his or her safety. Shortly before I break the window of the vehicle with my window punch, I will be advising the Loudoun County Sheriffs Office of my findings and actions, and a deputy and I will greet you upon your return to your now damaged vehicle, and safe child. Last summer, I broke can windows There really is not a good excuse for leaving your child in the vehicle while you don’t even have it in sight.
BODIES OF WATER
Even as an EMT, I was a little afraid to bathe my first born, because I felt he would be very slippery, and difficult to keep from falling over. I quickly got over it (thanks to some, ah, prodding, from my wife). I think, generally speaking, we know we shouldn’t leave our kids alone in the bath until, say, puberty. Ok, maybe that’s a bit late, but until they can at least manage the bath themselves, safely. Those little “seats” that hold up your infant in the bath? I wouldn’t rely on them. You can’t leave your child for a second around, or in, a body of water. Remember that their noses are tiny, and so are their lungs. It only takes about ¼” (that is one quarter of an inch) of water to drown an infant. They only have to go face down and not be able to get back up, for a period of about 10-15 seconds (or less) to drown. Consider the following possible scenarios:
· While you run to get a forgotten towel during bath time, your child turns around to see where you went. She struggles, or waves her arms, and then tips over in her seat, going face down in one inch of water. You come back 45 seconds later, and it’s too late.
· While you are downstairs, your five year, who took swimming lessons, has a seizure while in the bathtub, and slips under the water. 20 minutes later, you notice it’s awfully quiet upstairs.
· Your two kids are playing in the rain, splashing in puddles. Your oldest gets a little rough and pushes the youngest into a mud puddle, face down. She gets stuck, and can’t get up. You’re inside doing laundry, and your oldest takes off in the other direction.
I don’t mean to breed paranoid parent syndrome, or set it up so you can never be away from your child. However, there are numerous instances of tragedies, which are on record, that could have been avoided by parents who do the right thing. As a dad, especially when the kids were young, I tried my best to take advantage of the sleeping child to get work done, relax, nap, or whatever. However, if the child were asleep, and I arrived at the grocery store, my ONLY two options were to wake the child and take him in with me, or abort the trip. Leaving him in his car seat while I went inside was simply not an option, not even for a second. Yes, it may seem like a waste of time and resources to be “nearby” while they are bathing. Use this otherwise idle time to clean the bedroom, or spruce up the bathroom. Take your laptop upstairs, and check your email from the bathroom, or the hallway outside. Call your friends on the phone from the next room, so that you can keep an ear on things.
Being a new parent is a whole new world. Everybody will tell you to childproof your home, and keep everything safe. What they don’t tell you is about how and when to take shortcuts, and about these other “things” that we do, day in and day out, that sometimes, unwittingly, put our children in danger. As we have seen time and again in the newspaper, it only takes a few seconds to create a tragedy.
This article originally appeared in The First Word, and is written by Curt Newport
